Explanations

I received a comment today that I wanted to respond to:

No offense… but I read your blog for your cuckqueaning stories and personal experiences. I know I wouldn’t be regularly reading it if I didn’t already know quite a bit about the stuff you post on “teaching tuedays” (seeing as I am involved with the scene), and I suspect it’s much the same with the rest of your readership. That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t post it at all but the fact that it’s all you write about now is kind of disappointing.

 

There is a huge misconception that BDSM is 100% 24/7. While we consider our marriage 24/7 TPE it doesn’t always work out that way. There are days when we fight like every other married couple. There are days where neither of us are in the mood. There are days where we’re so exhausted from the week we just want to sleep. Like I mentioned in my TT post about Edge Play at the end – K brought me to orgasm early. It was delightful, it was erotic, it was heavenly and explosive – but what happens post orgasm, without fail – happened again. I lose all desire to submit. In fact, I suddenly feel extremely dominant after I orgasm. K and I both identify as switches, but we have found that it works better in our marriage if we have a traditional Dom/sub relationship. That creates a large part of the problem for me.Once I have orgasmed I get angry with myself for liking the things I like, and I try to take over. I try to force K to submit to me so I feel some sense of balance. I used to meet that need when we dated sub girls, but we havent in quite some time. I’m a sadist (when it comes to women) and I relish in taking a cane to a bare bottom, dancing a single tail across bare breasts, kissing away tears…oh boy, that’s another post though. Anyhow – when I try to force K to submit to me it doesn’t work. It never happens. Thus, we fight and we’re both miserable. I know I’m being stupid. I know it won’t work. I know I should stop. I know all of these things, but I can’t bring myself to get out of that funk. That “ice princess, total bitch, dominant woman” feeling stays for a solid two weeks. So – here we are two weeks later, post O, and just last night I felt “okay” enough to curl up in K’s lap and let myself feel little. This is something I seriously struggle with. I can’t quite put my finger on why it’s so difficult for me to submit post orgasm, but I’m working on it.

As far as my readership, I (surprisingly enough) have a lot of vanilla subscribers that email me asking lifestyle questions, terminology questions, BDSM questions, etc. That is where Teaching Tuesday started. I personally feel like there is so much misinformation in the lifestyle (hence why it gets such a bad rap) that I have no problem taking the time to help as best I can.

I am also a wife, an employee with pressing deadlines, an active Aunt, a house hunter, a best friend, a sister, a daughter, etc. Considering my blog is non-fiction kink based I leave those aspects of my life out. I’ve contemplated writing about them here, but I have a different 100% vanilla blog in a different world for that. But, since we’re now talking about that – K recently started a new job with huge opportunities and a wonderful growth in his career, I’m under 18 million deadlines at work and we’re in the process of house hunting. Our weekends have been filled with life: paying bills, looking at houses, youth football games, family dinners and our friends.

And since this blog is my kink/cuckqueaning side of my life – it’s hard to write about those things when they aren’t actively occurring – which kind of leaves me with Teaching Tuesday. Life and me being an Ice Princess has gotten in the way of kink, and while we’d rather spend our lives 100% invested in kink and our dirty minds, unfortunately, we can’t. We aren’t currently seeing anyone and there really isn’t anyone on the horizon either. It’s not for a lack of trying or thought, but nothing has really caught my eye lately. We’d love to find a switch to date. Someone that can meet all of our needs, but those seem few and far between. Though what a fun and wild ride it’d be.

It’s been difficult to be a cuckquean poly wife that switches. None of those things go together, but I’m trying to figure it out with an amazing Husband by my side.

So, with all of that being said, I hope it explains a little about where I’m at. I do actually have a couple of drafts in the works, but my writing hasn’t been very fruitful lately.

Teaching Tuesday (Wednesday) – Chastity

A lot of people do not understand chastity or how people can do it. Wikipedia does a pretty good job explaining some of it in a BDSM sense. They comment that it increases submissiveness in men, I also believe it does that in women, as well. At least it does for me. I have a catch 22 – love/hate relationship with chastity, as I imagine most chastity wearers do. I love to orgasm. I am greedy with my orgasms. If I were not committed to living this 24/7 Master/slave lifestyle I would cum multiple times a day; however, it’s not in the best interest of our marriage for me to cum. Orgasming changes hormones and your mood. After I orgasm I am rude. I am difficult. I do not like to behave. I’m in a terrible mood. I am angry. I go through an array of emotions for two full weeks. I hate the emotions I go through and I also hate not orgasming, but I understand that my 5 to 10 minutes of pleasure is not acceptable or worth it for K to deal with the following two weeks of total bitchiness from me. It does not mean it’s easy. It does not mean I enjoy it. It just means that K has decided he’d rather not deal with me being a total cunt for two weeks and because of that I do not orgasm.

I’ve gotten several emails inquiring about chastity and then Eruditish asked that I cover chastity in Teaching Tuesday and I thought better late than never! Female chastity is such a complicated thing. There are your typical full steel chastity belts that are for permanent use, but often not comfortable and not as hygienic as most women would like to be. There are your leather chastity belts that are for short term use/play time and then that’s about it. There’s the double bar horizontal clit shield, but most women have VCH and just one. Steelwerks has another double bar horizontal. I simply cannot find a VCH chastity piercing. Steelwerks does have custom ordering though, if that tickles your fancy. I actually just ordered this nipple shield piercing that should work. I’m hoping I can replace the barbell with my padlock even. Fingers crossed. It should be here in a week or so. :D

I whole heartedly I want to hear more about any chastity enforcement you have tried. My cuckquean wife has a VCH piercing so your washer idea might work for her. If you could post a picture, or at least describe it in more detail, that would be helpful.
I have a picture of it here. Unfortunately it doesn’t work very well and I only use it in extreme situations where I 100% know in my heart I will orgasm the second I am alone.

Does your regular barbel piercing hold the washer in place or do you use something else? I actually use a padlock, which was effective.

How secure and effective is it? Does it make masturbation impossible, significantly more difficult, or is it more of a reminder? It was secure and impossible to stimulate without pain – but there was the problem – pain.

Is it safe and comfortable enough for long-term wear? The clitoral hood isn’t exactly a durable piece of skin and I’d be worried about ripping it (ouch). While I do get a little rough with my favorite toy, I don’t want to break her. That was the problem – it’s not comfortable or durable for long term wear. It solved the immediate problem when too close to cumming with the slightest stimulation, but not safe or comfortable enough for long term wear.

You’ve mentioned that sometimes you feel the need for enforcement. Do you accomplish that with some sort of locking device or is it more a matter of trust and the threat of punishment? I definitely do feel the need for enforcement.

Instead of a washer, a similar idea I’ve seen is cutting the handle off a spoon and using that as a shield. That sounds like a more effective shield but also more difficult to keep in place. Either way, even with a fancy custom-made shield and double HCH piercings, I don’t understand how it could ever be enforced without some sort of locking mechanism. Yes, I’ve seen the spoon; however, that also won’t work for long term either due to comfort/logistics/etc.

I hope this helps and answers some of the looming chastity questions. I’ll be sure to take a picture of the new jewelry and see how it works out! :)

Who is she?

I realized the other day that I have created this perfect “other woman” in my head. She’s the same woman in every fantasy. She is 100% different than me.

In my fantasy she is older – maybe 40’ish. She’s the soccer mom blonde – upper class – professional – business woman – established and doesn’t give a fuck about me. She has a banging body, perky tits from a perfect boob job and a tight ass. She’s 40, but carries it so well. She’s confident, sexy and unrelenting. In my fantasy she is riding K and making me watch. I am next to the bed, in my cage with a butt plug in and gagged with her wet panties. She laughs at me and tells me how good it feels. She laughs at me for letting my husband fuck her. She tells me that she gets all of my orgasms now and I’ll be lucky if I ever cum again. She doesn’t give a fuck about me at all and gets off on being mean to me. After they both cum she sits on top of my cage and lets the cum drip onto my face and body. I smell like their sex. 

This fantasy has turned into a dream now. A frequent dream I have. Sometimes it ends there and sometimes it ends with them watching a movie on the couch and me at their feet. She’ll say “lick” whenever she wants and I know to worship her pussy and asshole. She’ll laugh at me. Sometimes she drags me back to my cage and pisses on me and makes me watch them fuck again. She gets off on K degrading me, too. She encourages him to always use me as a urinal. She encourages him to never let me cum again.

 

She is a bitch. A perfect, beautiful bitch.